Things I learned whilst in New Jersey

So I just got back yesterday from a little trip to the lovely region of Central New Jersey. Like with any trip to a previously unknown location, I learned a few things about myself and my fellow humans over the past few days.

1) People don't need to walk. Driving (badly) to the store can be enough. Anyone who says different must be from California.

2) My Ford Focus rental was a zippy little bastard, with great gas mileage. Too bad I pre-paid for that tank of gas. Luckily, I took me two hours every night to find a quick bite to eat.

3) Central NJ is gorgeous, gorgeous, gorgeous. Full of trees, trees, trees. And that's about it.

4) Who knew an Ivy League school would only have one local bar? They must be smart because they stay so sober...

5) Street lights are good. Especially at night. Especially when driving down a two-lane road in the middle of nowhere and the posted speed limit is 45 mph and some asshole is riding my tail and I can't find the hotel. Street lights would be really nice then.

6) I nearly hit Bambi's mom. I didn't, but that's only because the Focus also has awesome brakes. Though street lights would have helped.

7) There is a point where getting lost goes from an inconvenience to being an art. I have elevated it to somewhere between Munch's Scream and Picasso's Guernica.

8) It is possible to read three books in three days. All it takes is being in Central NJ with no where to go.

9) NJ is in the middle of a time-space vortex. I really don't understand how 3.5 miles can take me 20 minutes, but I can make it to NYC in less than an hour.

10) I still want to work in a bookstore. Yup. It's not over yet.